IS THERE LIFE AFTER DIVORCE?

The divorce is over. Children issues are settled, the money has been divided, you are finished with your lawyer, the final papers have been signed. What a relief! Or is it?

For many people who have finally finished with the legal process the worst part is just about to begin. A great number of recently divorced feel the sudden impact of lonliness and isolation soon after the hubub of the legal battle has subsided. What was an integral part of your life has now disappeared – and I don’t mean your husband or wife. I mean the quest for justice that dominated your existence, dominated your conversations with friends and relatives, woke up with you and went to sleep with you. Over. Finished. Gone.

How do you now refocus and move on. For some that is a very difficult task. Being involved in a legal proceeding that has consequences that are very critical to your future means that you must be closely connected to the process. Constant review of documents, frequent emails, calls and meetings with your lawyer, and court appearances can become almost an obsession. The time commitment is substantial; in some cases huge. When it ends there is an immediate need to find something to fill in the void.

You need to refocus and redefine yourself. You do not have to return to your old routines and habits. You are in control. You have control over yourself and control over the directions that your life will take. This can be, if you want it to, a  new beginning.  The beginning of a new life, the beginning of self empowerment, the potential for a world of new experiences. It is an opportunity to thrive, to make intelligent and informed decisions that will affect your future in a positive way.

Do not view your divorce as an ending. View it as an opportunity to begin a fresh, exciting experience, to redefine who you are and where you are headed.